Tag Archives: vintage

Visited My Childhood Arcade, And It Wasn’t Too Shabby.

26 Nov

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Before I moved out of Texas and headed out to the Pacific Northwest, I wound up going on some trips to haunts of my adolescence with my brother as a sort of little-bro/big-sis bonding. At one point we wound up at the Killeen Mall, hanging out with an old high school friend.   Mostly, the mall is exactly what you expect:

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But when we found ourselves back at the arcade of our childhood, it was surprisingly fun. But then, spending the day in Killeen, Texas can really throw off your expectations so who can even tell. It was definitely not as depressing as anticipated. Other than the surprising lack of, well, arcade games, there was a lot of fun bright colors and rides. Parts of it looked like they were recovered from a Six Flags or something similar, and there were some games in the back that seemed like downright antiques (but in a creepy, aesthetically pleasing way).  It also included a full indoor black light mini-golf course.

Also, apparently TILT is a franchise.

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Some Dude’s Regrettable Punk Phase Just Got Immortalized By Urban Outfitters.

24 Sep

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So, like, at first I found this hilarious, and then it made me angry, and now it’s hilarious again.

The misguided anger was when I thought this was a piece they were mass-producing, and we’ll get to while it bothered me in a bit. But it turns out this piece is fro an online feature they have called Urban Renewal Vintage and holy shit, I thought certain vintage storefronts in meatspace were overpriced and way too full of themselves.

I mean, it’s none of my concern when rich people willfully line up to be ripped off and spend the money I spend on rent on worthless crap to feel “edgy” or whatever. And if some dork wants to lay down $375 (holy shit really?) on a jacket that will get him beat up if he wears it in public, well I hope to see a video of him sobbing on Youtube.

But this jacket is a work of near-artful levels of NOPE-ness to a point where I cannot let it be. Let’s start with the product description:

“Crazy awesome vintage moto leather jacket from the 1990s. Topped with hand-painted punk logos at like Sex Pistols and Crass. Excellent vintage condition. We only have one, so get it or regret it!”

Setting aside figuring out what the exact fuck “excellent vintage condition” means, and the fact that whoever created this thing probably regrets it’s existence, what we already see is that it’s a jacket from the 1990s with a bunch of poorly rendered logos of bands from the 1970s. That’s pretty lol enough but let’s really get into how awful these logos are.

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Do we want to even get into the reasons having CRASS and The Clash on the same jacket is pretty absurd? I mean, sheesh.

And I guess I hadn’t mentioned yet that it has built-in shoulderpads, but jfc it has built-in shoulderpads.

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And yes it apparently comes with buttons already pinned on, with “rockin” slogans like “I’ve Got A Dirty Mind” and some sort of half-assed anarchy yin yang (what?). The piece de resistance, however is the recommended follow-up purchases:

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If you need any more proof than the above that punk is dead, I honestly don’t know what to say.

23 Of The Ugliest Video Game Accessories I’ve Ever Seen.

18 Aug

Prepare to see some of the most hideously off-brand 1990s-ish stuff ever. It’s so 1990s I’m not sure why I’m not posting this on Tumblr. Anyway, let’s soft grunge this blog up a bit:

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^I may have to do an entire post just based on this ad sometime, TBH.
No way I’m gonna let a company with the brand acronym STD get by without a making fun of them further.